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Old School News

Fetal Positions

	Eric Millikin

May 21, 2001 - Whatever. Casey went to the Motor City Comics Con this past weekend to represent all things Fetus. He met a lot of old-school fans, and made a lot of new school ones. Damned papparazzi snapped a few photos just before he kicked Lou Ferrigno's ass. Photographic evidence has been run in all the finest periodicals, such as The Comics Continuum.

This can only mean one thing: the Fetus-X/Witchblade cross-over is probably moments away.

Alright, mailbag.

Hey, when is there going to be a new Fetal Positions?

Alexis

Right about now.

I am the biggest fetus fan on the planet and I have a pretty big collection of fetus crap. I collect anything with a fetus on it and the book would complete my collection. If I said anymore I would just be lying to try to get stuff.

Toby

Alright, here's the deal: latest word is that The Butcher Paper, containing a universe-ripping ten pages of Fetus-X excitement, should hit the streets in early June. It's also got some work by Mike Diana and various of our incarcerated friends. More info here soon, as well as at The Butcher Paper site.

Now pay close attention, here's who gets free copies: Those who go above and beyond the call of duty in promotion of Fetus-X. If you're ever in the East Lansing area, get your bad motor booty down to the International center and check out the wild huge-ass mural down there. (Yes, my art history studies have led me to use descriptive terms such as "wild huge-ass.") Then read the Fetus-X related inscription -- it'll bring a tear to your Fetus-loving eyes. That's the type of promotion we're talking about. So go spray paint "Fetus-X Rulez" on your local overpass, send us photos, and we'll send you a book. Who says crime doesn't pay?

Speaking of marketing, check this smack out:

Hello,

I visited www.fetusx.com and I noticed that you are not listed on some search engines. I am sure you can increase the number of people who visit www.fetusx.com . Do you know TrafficMagnet? TrafficMagnet is a unique technology that instantly submits your web site to over 300,000+ search engines and directories every month. This is a very low-cost and effective way of advertising your site.

To check our prices and submit www.fetusx.com to 300,000+ search engines, go to TrafficMagnet.net

I would love to hear from you.

Best Regards,
Christine Hall
Sales & Marketing
www.TrafficMagnet.net

Here's what I wrote back to Christine:

Dear Christine,

Thanks for your interest in promoting Fetus-X, but I'm afraid your "low-cost" method of promotion is probably way too rich for our "no wages" method of working. Our current promotional tools consist of bathroom graffitti, strippers' tattoos, and screaming "Fetusx.com" at homeless men from moving automobiles. If you would like to join us in these or any other "no cost" promotional efforts, feel free.

Yours in fetal pleasure,
Eric Millikin

I still haven't heard back from Christine. Perhaps her new tattoos are still healing.

Eric,

The last three series were cool. The cemetary one is great so far. Do most people realize the pettiness of their existence due mainly to the imprisonment of modern human society? Probably not. Also, was that Bert Reynolds that unleashed the Fetus-crab? Could you explain the "From the Darkness" joke to me? I think the animation is really cool. Talk to ya...

Marcel

Hey, glad your down with the latest. There'll be more animation in the near future. I'll answer your questions in the order you asked them:

1) No, most people do not realize the pettiness of their existence. But, as soon as they do, we'll stop reminding them.

2) No, that was not Bert Reynolds. That was a fading publicity photo of poet/thinker/artist Robert Goulet, whom you may or may not realize is the shadow cast by our shadow government.

3) Yes, I could explain "From Out of the Darkness" but I'd much rather have you and any other readers explain to me their understandings and analyses of it. I'll print them here next time!

Got Words? Send 'em to dudes@fetusx.com.

Keep your fetus cool,