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Old School News

Fetal Positions

	Eric Millikin

Dec. 26, 2001 - Hey, I just moved into a new house so if you're stalking me you'll have to change your routine a little bit. The move has kept me extremely busy, as well as this holiday crap, but rest assured that all Fetus-X projects will continue as scheduled.

When Casey hasn't been trying to help me move by wedging my desk into my new hall way so that we have to take it apart with hammers, he's managed to work on a few new silk screen techniques as well. Casey and I are print makers from way back (we're talking fine art prints here). I always looked at Fetus-X as a continuation of our print making (wood cuts, lithography, and silk screen) careers -- simply moving into an area of extreme multiples through newspaper printing and the Internet. Anyway, Casey printed up some prototype glow in the dark T-shirts and we're working on some large format Fetus-X prints as well. The large format prints will be perfect for your art galleries and coffee shops and over your living room couches. Drop us a line at dudes@fetusx.com and let us know how interested you guys are in such things, and which comics you'd most like to see on a shirt or a big-ass print.

Sister Kate Magazine

Speaking of printing, you can find Fetus-X printed in the latest edition of Sister Kate magazine. According to Sister Kate herself, you can find the magazine at the following cool places:

Lawrence, KS:
LoveGarden

Kansas City Metro Area:
Andrew Drips Coffee House
YJ's
Balanca's
Broadway Café
Corner Restaurant
Plaza & Westport Libraries
Davey's Uptown Rambler's Club
It's A Beautiful Day
all Muddy's Coffeehouses
Recycled Sounds
Westport Coffeehouse
Streetside Records
Mildred's Coffeehouse
Sydney's Diner
Missy B's

New York City:
St. Mark's Place Bookstore

Santa Barbara, CA:
selected places

If you can't get to any of those fine locales, check out the Sister Kate Website at http://www.diversepress.com/sisterkate. You can read some of the articles there, buy a subscription, etc. It's a cool magazine. If you work on a cool publicaton that you think would be even cooler with Fetus-X in it, let dudes@fetusx.com know.

Insert Polish Joke

OK, I've heard from all sorts of Fetus-X fans from around the globe. Are there any of you that speak Polish? And if so, can you explain to me what this is all about - http://www.polishmagazine-express.com/arch00/10-00a.html? The photo is scanned from an old story about me that was in Parade Magazine, but I have no idea what the story says, or why they chose to run a huge grainy photo of me in a story about me, Tom Hanks, Steve Jobs, Katie Kouric, Tiger Woods, and Deion Sanders. Yeah, I know, if you want to sell Polish magazines, the conventional wisdom must be to run huge photos of guys who write stories about fetuses, because I'm sure Fetus-X has much more recognition in Poland than Tom Hanks or Tiger Woods.

And while I'm on the international kick, anyone who wants to bring me an English translation of this site - http://sozluk.sourtimes.org/show.asp?t=fetus+x - will earn themselves a few Karma points. Send all translations to dudes@fetusx.com.

Eric's Mail Bag

I suppose I should keep the international theme going here. While I'm somewhat accustomed to receiving letters of appreciation from all over the world, it hasn't been until recently that the hate mail has started coming from outside the U.S. I suppose you can draw your own conclusions about why Fetus-X love has spread faster than Fetus-X hate. Maybe it's because Fetus-X haters are generally more slow-witted? Anyway, feast your eyes on this letter from Alumno_Uni somewhere in Latin America:

Subject: Warning

Idiot: you should think the things that you say and do. Jesus is not a person couple(par) aque you joke.

My response:

Hola, gracias por su E-mail.

Aquí están mis sugerencias: Usted debe leer mis cuentos otra vez. Recuerde que Jesús está en todas las cosas, incluyendo nuestras ilustraciones. También, usted debe entender que estos cuentos son ficticios. No soy como muchos sacerdotes que digan mentiras. No estoy demandando mis palabras para ser las palabras del dios.

Usted debe mantener su mente abierta. Quizás usted puede ser ayudado por estos cuentos. Usted debe pensar de sus actitudes, y entonces usted debe pensar de las actitudes de Jesús.

Juzgando por el tono del odio en su carta, usted debe pasar más tiempo en pensamiento. Usted debe comparar el odio en su carta al amante en el corazón de Jesús.

Considere esto: Jesús era originalmente carpintero, artesano. Qué profesión él trabajará después del resurrection? Un hombre de negocios del capitalista? Un artista?

Usted cree que Jesús enviaría E-mail que insulta?

Jesús era un pensador único por su tiempo. Estoy entristecido para ver las ideas de Jesús usadas para desalentar la libertad del pensamiento hoy.

Estoy entristecido para ver un mensaje de la paz torcido en una excusa para enviar E-mail enojado.

Respetemos a toda la gente de religiones diversas. Si alguien es diferente, no significa que son un "idiota."

Cómo puede usted desear entender la palabra del dios cuando usted no puede tomar la época de entender "Fetus-X"?

Hagamos el mundo un lugar mejor.

Sincero,
Eric Millikin
http://www.fetusx.com/

I never did receive a response back. Perhaps there was a flaw in my argument or maybe my Spanish is worse than I thought. On an infinitely more pleasurable note, here's an e-mail from a cool guy in Germany called WinterRabe. I hooked him up with the password to the big printable comics so he could spread the Fetus-X message in Germany ...

:o) Now I am a happy guy and soon the rest of the world will follow.... Mmh, I thought about spreading the printed comics in the college i actually study at.I study at the "Gerhard-Mercator-College", Duisburg, Germany. Let the celebrations begin, Fetus crossed the deep blue sea... *g* yiks, bow to the fetus... cu and really really thanks a lot for the one and only comic that makes a pathetic goth creature break with it's principles and smile.

And, we've still got plenty of appreciative readers who go the extra mile for us in the U.S.:

heyy, i was just wondering if i could get a username and password for downloading the "big comics". i actually want them so that i can go to my school newspaper and see if they would publish it. i go to rutgers university, and my school newspaper has been known to publish interesting and highly political comics such as this one.  does that count as a good reason? If all else fails and i get the "RU-SCREW" i am gonna have to start my own paper either in print or online with some chill stuff like this.  the comic is truely awe-inspiring.

-yasir

I hooked yasir up with the big comics password. If anyone else wants to help yasir get Fetus-X in the Rutgers student newspaper, scrawl your reasons for Fetus love all over the handy form at http://www.dailytargum.com/main.cfm?include=submit.

hey. i was wondering how i could get fetus-x printed in the paper around here... i live in raleigh, north carolina, and i am absolutely obsessed with fetus's. :) i would appreciate it if i could get some information on how to do this. thanks for your time.

lacie

I hooked Lacie up with all the info to help her in her quest to get Fetus-X in her newspaper. If you'd like help getting Fetus-X in your newspaper, or if you happen to work at a newspaper yourself, talk to the dudes@fetusx.com for some help in attaining journalistic excellence.

Cool? So, until next time, keep sending your darkest thoughts, dreams, comments and ideas to dudes@fetusx.com.

Peace,